The Guest Stars of
"Damien"

by Wild Willie Westwood

SatanSatan and DamienDamien

Damien is the Son of Satan, and he comes to call Jesus out. When he gets angry, the flames of hell appear in his eyes and he sets whatever he will on fire. He makes friends with Pip, and his evil is virtually eliminated by Mr. Mackey. He now appears in the back of the bus during the opening credits. Satan fights once again with Jesus for spiritual dominion, but opts for wealth instead of fame. He appeared with Barbra Streisand on a poster in her $4 million condo in the mountains, and has been paired with Saddam Hussein in Hell. In the movie, he becomes Saddam's bitch, and it is Kenny's mission to restore Satan to his former evil self. In the two-parter, "Do The Handicapped Go To Hell" and" Probably", Saddam gets a new boyfriend, Chris, whom he's happy with until Saddam reenters the picture. Chris and Saddam fight over Satan until Satan decides to get rid of Saddam for good - by sending him to Heaven.

The Groundskeeper

The Groundskeeper

This is the only episode in which we see her. The kids are in the playground for recess and Cartman is announcing changes in the gifts his classmates should get him. At about this time she announces to all in the playground that there are five minutes left in recess.

Don King, Promoter

Don King, Promoter

This is the one and only, Don King, boxing promoter extraordinair. He comes to represent Satan, and speaks for Satan when a reporter asks if Satan was involved in the Gulf War. He wanted the reporters to not ask questions about Satan not related to the fight and not speculate about what kind of fighters he has in his stable.

Michael BufferReferee Mills Lane
Michael Buffer and Mills Lane
Buffer's Catch Phrase: Lllet's get ready to rumbllle!!

Michael Buffer is the ring announcer for the fight between Jesus and Satan. He calls Jesus "Hay-zeus" and Satan "Beelzebub." He trills the 'r' in Christ. Mills Lane is as famous as Michael Buffer in the boxing world. He referees the match between Jesus and Satan, telling them not to use miracles to win the fight. When Jesus "knocks" Satan down, Mr. Lane counts him out and ends the match. Jesus rejoices.