The Guest Stars of
"Freak Strike"
by Wild Willie Westwood
Maury Povich, Vanessa and Vanity, Joline and Chantal
Maury Povich is famous for having shows on freaks and out-of-control kids. For the kids there's boot camp as a prize. Vanessa and Vanity are mother and daughter. Vanessa lost control of Vanity some time ago, and now Vanity runs with gangs and does heroin. She slaps her mother at every opportunity, and Vanessa is helpless to do anything about it. Joline and Chantal are another mother-daughter pair, but Chantal just gets naked for fun. She knows this gets her attention, but doesn't know the connotations adults draw from it. Joline is just jealous at the attention this takes away from her own efforts at romance.
Show Stagehand, Show Telephone Operator, New York Police Captain
Cartman talks to the operator about getting Butters out to New York, and when he sees Butters win a prize the other boys can't share in, he calls again to submit his own deformity. The stagehand makes sure the guests are ready for their appearances and shows Cartman where to go to get changed. The police captain and his men show up to disperse the protesting freaks, or at least to make sure things don't get out of hand.
Some of The Freaks
Man With No Face, Man With Foot On Head, Disfigured Country Singer, Man With No Limbs
Man With Terrible Skin Condition, Incredibly Obese Black Man, Elephant Man, Damla Jones
Damla is the first freak to be seen. She has no midsection, so she's basically a head with arms right under her ears and legs where her neck would be. The man with no face lost the upper part of his face and nose. He's done Jenny Jones only once. The man with foot on head is one of the leading voices for TFU. The washed-up country singer has made a living of appearing on talk shows. The man with no limbs challenges Butters about being a scab. The man with terrible skin condition is the leader of the Freaks and leads them on a strike against Maury Povich. The incredibly obse black man prefers to be known as the incredibly black obese man. And finally, the Elephant Man gets to deliver the speech extolling the things freaks do to make a living, and why the freaks are valuable to the general public.