The Secrets of
"Child Abduction is Not Funny"

by Wild Willie Westwood, with sources from all over the Web


Frederick Johnson sounds like Aslan the Lion in "Here Comes the Neighborhood." But how was he able to glow like that?

The "ghost" - from Charles Dickens' "A Christmas Carol", only here it's just one 'Ghost of Human Kindness' with Tweek instead of three ghosts with Scrooge.

"And I would have gotten with it again if it weren't for you meddling policemen" - from "Scooby Doo." A paraphrase of a common line in that show with criminals under arrest thanks to those meddling kids.

Words written on Tuong's telescope: Mongolian Spotter.

Crust E. Krotch = Chuck E. Cheese. In later episodes, Crust E. Krotch became Whistlin' Willy's.

The long tables the boys were sitting at and the way they were sitting there have a passing resemblance to those in the famous Last Supper painting.

Chris and Tom don't know who is who - they use "Chris" and "Tom" on each other. I'm going with what I heard first.

"Say hello to my little friend!" - line used by Al Pacino in Scarface. He was holding a machine gun when he said that line.

When the parents say good-bye to the kids, there's an unfinished portion of the scene in the background. At left, behind the front row of houses, are two garages. One of them doesn't have a door or back wall.

Shelley, though she's 12 or 13, is now too old to be abducted, apparently.

The ram's horn and the way the children left the town is a bit like the Israelites leaving Egypt in The Ten Commandments.

Where was Barbrady?

The Two Great Walls - The Great Wall of China and the Berlin Wall. The Chinese built their wall over several centuries to keep the Mongolians out, but the Wall was always breached. Much of it is missing now, and some of it is buried under the Gobi desert. Mr. Lu Kim's encounters with the Mongolians parallel the Chinese experience with them. The Mayor asking Mr. Tuong to tear down the wall comes from former President Ronald Reagan demanding that Mikhail Gorbachev tear down the Berlin Wall.

The episode begins with the juxtaposition of former values of citizenship on today's wary kids. Tweek, for one, is told not to talk to strangers, even if they pretend to be trusted members (like policemen) of the community. And then he is faced with situations a Boy Scout would handle quite well, and balks. A Boy Scout would have been more than willing to help a lost driver find his way to his destination, help an old lady across the street, and help a paralyzed man away from danger, but because of so much (justified) fear in today's world, kids can't afford to be so helpful. Tweek could be any kid now. What are Scouts taught these days concerning strangers?

The episode capitalizes on the various forms of child abduction out there, starting outside and working in. If the abductor is a stranger, a tracking device will do. If the abductor is someone familiar, supervision is the answer. If the abductor is a family member... well, you send the kids away so you don't lose them to a husband or wife.Yeah, that's the ticket. Makes perfect sense. Problem solved. :)