The Secrets of
"Bloody Mary"

by Wild Willie Westwood, with sources from all over the Web


Randy's drink
.

Stan says he's 8 again, but remembers being a cult leader not too long ago.

Will there be more Japanese cultural references in the next three years? First, the reason someone would marry an Asian woman (to avoid having ginger kids). Second, the name of someone at the Japanese space program (Sugiyama, Trey's fiancée Emma's last name), and now a dojo.

Cartman is wearing a WWII-era Japanese flag as a headband - a reference to the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbot on December 7, 1941, which prompted the US entry into World War II.

The bleeding statue can refer to this article, and to a lesser extent, to December 8, the Feast of the Immaculate Conception (Mary is said to have been conceived without any original sin or stain of it, so that Jesus could be born from a perfect vessel, as befits a King of kings and Lord of lords. In centuries past Mary was compared to the Ark of the Covenant, which was made to exacting specifications given by God himself).

"Randy, you are powerless to make that decision." - an adaptation of the Christian teaching that one is powerless against sin without God in his life, which leads to this comparison:

Twelve-Step Program

  1. We admitted we were powerless over alcohol--that our lives had become unmanageable.
  2. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.
  3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.
  4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.
  5. Admitted to God, to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.
  6. Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.
  7. Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.
  8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.
  9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.
  10. Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.
  11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.
  12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.

Christian Principles

  1. We admitted we were sinners - that our lives had become unmanageable.
  2. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could justify us and take away our sin.
  3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God.
  4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.
  5. Admitted to God, to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.
  6. Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.
  7. Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.
  8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.
  9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.
  10. Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.
  11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.
  12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to fellow sinners, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.

The only differences are that one weakness is specified, and that God is generalized so that you can pray to the god of your choice to help you overcome this one weakness. If you understand that there's no god at all, there's no one to ask help from, and the 12 Steps fall apart on you. There must be at least one similar program for atheist and agnostic alcoholics though.